It has been 24hours since I heard the news of failed pregnancy from the doctor. Even my closest buddy
was concerned and called me just to make sure I wasn't putting up a
front so that everyone around me feels better. But this time, I am
really ok and I am thankful for that.
I think the plus point of going through this experience is that I have allowed
God to come in a little more to help me heal my heart. So this time, I
am not acting fine. I think I really am fine. And
honestly, I had given this IVF my best effort and because of that, I am
able to move on quicker than expected.
I think it also helped that I have stopped asking why for a long time. I had
experienced some difficult times when growing up. Through repeated
incidents, I had learnt that asking why doesn't give me answers. I am not sure if I am ready to
re-open my heart to those who have hurt me, unless I am sure they
won't trample on it. But at least this is a start.
If you ask me now, I am possibly more
bothered by the fact that my hubby was out partying 2 days in a row. Hahaha! But it was his birthday and he had been
'barred' from partying for 3 weeks. But what can I say - I have no
control over that boy and he has been such a sweet soul.
Adieu
for now, at least about IVF. I will update on other stuff again, and
of course the results of the post review with my IVF doc on 20 Jul!
It is through difficult times that we learn to appreciate those around us and make us a stronger person.
ReplyDeleteThanks Jumbo girl. Sometimes, the difficult times could make us harden our hearts as a way to become stronger. Or at least I used to do that I think. Now I am trying to be stronger through faith.
ReplyDelete